It’s not your first baby… the landscape of life has changed. A LOT. It’ s err quite different from when there was only one baby to worry about. The two-year-old is ‘going through a phase’, there are sometimes feelings of displacement and brief moments of intense love from your toddler towards your baby, which is cute but a little alarming (and sometimes your toddlers is entirely indifferent).
The concern comes up in almost every enquiry from a family with more than one child. Usually it sounds something like: “Our four-year-old will not sit still for anything” or simply “I’m worried how it will go. It’s not like it was when there was only one baby.”
Your toddler almost certainly won’t ruin your newborn session. And even when sessions feel chaotic from the inside, the photos rarely reflect that (and if they do we do it in a way that’s wholesome and beautiful).
Here’s what sibling involvement actually looks like in a newborn session, and why I think the unpredictability is usually an asset rather than a problem.
Toddlers do not need to cooperate to be in great photos
The expectation that older children need to sit nicely, look at the camera and hold still for an extended period of time is a studio photography idea. It doesn’t have much to do with how real families work, and it definitely doesn’t describe most toddlers.
In an in-home newborn session, I’m not waiting for everyone to perform. I’m watching for the moments that happen naturally. The way an older sibling peeks over a parent’s shoulder to look at the baby. The four seconds before they run off again. The completely unsolicited cuddle that lasts about three seconds. I only need three seconds.
Some of my favourite sibling photos have happened when the older child was technically “not cooperating” at all.
What the session actually looks like with multiple kids
For most families with a toddler or preschooler, the session has a natural rhythm. Older kids tend to join in for a bit, then drift off to play, then come back when something catches their interest. That pattern works really well for photography.
I often aim to get those full family/sibling photos fairly early, while everyone is fresh. We keep it brief and low pressure. I might ask them to sit on the bed next to mum, or touch the baby’s hand, or just cuddle in close while a parent holds the baby. Nothing complicated. Nothing that requires sustained attention.
After that, the older child can largely do what they like. They can play in the background, watch from the doorway, or wander in and out. If a spontaneous moment happens, I’ll catch it. If they want to be included again later, we’ll include them. There’s no script and no performance expected. I scatter little suggestions and play games or often let them be. They will want to be around you and what is happening. And I often turn them into my helper.
What about school-aged kids?
Older children tend to find the whole thing a bit more interesting, which helps. They’re usually happy to be involved for a bit longer, and they often have opinions about how they want to be included, which I’m always happy to work with.
The main thing with older kids is not putting too much pressure on the moment. If they feel like they’re being watched or directed too closely (especially by their parents) cooperation can go. If they feel like they’re just hanging out while I happen to be there with a camera, you will feel more calm and your photos will reflect that.
I photograph teenagers in newborn sessions too – families all look different. The approach is the same: low pressure, minimal direction, patience. (Maybe letting them wear what they want…)
The photos that matter most
Parents often come into a newborn session hoping for a particular image. The classic one: both children looking at the camera, baby calm, older child beaming, everyone perfectly placed.
Sometimes that happens. When it does, it’s lovely.
But the photos families tend to come back to years later are often the unstructured ones. The toddler who climbed onto the bed uninvited and pressed their face against the baby’s. The school-aged child snuggled in next to their new sister during a quiet moment. The moment of genuine delight on an older sibling’s face when the baby grabbed their finger. A joint giggle at a funny baby fart.
These are the photos that show what life actually looked like. They’re also the ones that are nearly impossible to stage. Let life happen. It’s ridiculously beautiful.
Practical things that help
A few things make sibling sessions run more smoothly in practice.
Timing matters. Sessions are usually in the morning, and that tends to work well for younger kids. If your toddler has a rough patch in the late morning or a scheduled nap, let me know and we can keep that in mind for when I come.
Snacks are useful, but save them for when you need them. Offering a snack too early can backfire. Clean snacks are better than anything sticky or brightly coloured, for obvious reasons.
Don’t hype it up too much. Kids who’ve been told this is a very important day where they need to be very good tend to feel the pressure. Kids who’ve just been told a photographer is coming over tend to take it in their stride.
You don’t need to manage them through the whole session
This is the thing parents find most surprising. You don’t have to keep your older child engaged and cooperative for an hour. You just have to show up.
I guide sessions in a very fluid manner. If your toddler decides to join in, that’s a bonus. If they’d rather build blocks in the other room, that’s completely fine we can work with that.
The session is about your whole family, including the reality that your family now has a very new member that everyone is still adjusting to. That adjustment, in all its messy and tender and funny detail, is exactly what’s worth documenting.
If you’d like to know more about how newborn sessions work, or you’re ready to book, send me a message and I can walk you through the process.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can siblings be included in a newborn photography session in Melbourne?
Yes! They should aboslutely be a part of your newborn session. Siblings don’t need to sit still or perform. I photograph whatever happens naturally, and those unscripted moments between older kids and a new baby are often the most meaningful photos in the whole gallery.
What if my toddler won’t cooperate during newborn photos?
This is the most common concern I hear, and it’s rarely the problem parents expect it to be. I aim to get sibling photos early and keep them brief and low-pressure, or I weave them in through our time together. After that, toddlers are free to do what they like. If they wander back in, I’ll catch the moment. If they’d rather play, that’s fine too.
How do you photograph a toddler and a newborn together safely?
The safest and most natural approach is to have a parent holding the baby while the toddler sits or stands close. I don’t ask toddlers to hold the newborn unless they’re old enough and clearly comfortable with the idea. Everything is calm, at floor or bed level, and a parent is always right there.
How does working with siblings of different ages in newborn photos work?
Toddlers, preschoolers, school-aged kids and teenagers all bring something different to a session. Younger kids tend to be less self-conscious, which often works in your favour. Older kids can be more intentional about how they want to be included. Both are great.
Do I need to do anything special to prepare my older child for a newborn session?
Not much. Let them know a photographer is coming over, keep it low-key, and don’t put too much pressure on the day. If they’ve had some time with the baby before the session starts, that often helps. Clean snacks on standby are never a bad idea. Feed them first!! Ensure they’re feeling your love too as sometimes they can feel a bit displaced with a new baby around.
